Jan 03
You dont stay, unless you are asked to stay!!!
I loaned out my electric griddle. Yea I have an electric griddle, I love cooking breakfast on it. Eggs, bacon, that tasty maple sausage…
I want my griddle back!!!
The other morning I awake with thoughts of maple sausage cooked on my electric griddle. I decided I’m going to go get my griddle and cook me some maple sausage. I don’t care if it is 5 A.M. Expecting to wake that freeloading bugger up, I rang his doorbell about 3 or 4 times, followed by a few bangs with my fist like the police. He quickly opened the door and let me in. He looked pretty tired. Not like I just woke him, but like he hasn’t been to sleep.
Before I can ask him about my griddle, I asked whats wrong with you, why aren’t you sleep. Before I can finish questioning him, I noticed something. I take in a deep whiff and noticed a familiar smell.
You’re cooking maple sausage on my Griddle? I asked. He said its a long story….
The night before, he was out with friends. Hangin out at Walmart, buying toothpaste and Ramen noodles, you know, the essentials of life. He got a couple cases of Coors lite for the week, and headed out to their respective cars. He stopped to get gas and there were a few girls in a minivan that just left a local club and were really drunk and flirty.
He picked one and had a nice little conversation that lead back to his house and you can guess the next step.
Afterwards, he had what he considered to be the "closing chat" with the young lady and the evening was over, they both go home to their own beds and sleep off the shame. But something didn’t happen the way he expected.
She didn’t leave!!!
He was up all night, He couldn’t sleep cause he wanted her to leave, and she was snoring like pitbull. He was nice, figured he’d let her get an hour or 2 then try the "closing chat" bit again and she’d go home.
Needless to say, I am at his house, it is about 6 A.M and she is in the kitchen cooking maple sausage on my griddle. This story makes me want to give every lady out there this little message. If you are the type that occasionally engage in trampy promiscuous er Spontaneous activities such as this…
You don’t stay, unless you are asked to stay!!!
You don’t ask him if its ok. You don’t assume that since you had such a good time he wants you to stay. You don’t assume he wants you to stay at all. what you can assume is he wants you to go home. it has no bearing on how much fun you guys had, or how well the evening went, HE WANTS YOU TO GO HOME. Have your "closing chat", say bye and hop into your car and go to your place of residence.
If he wants you to stay, he will ask. Dont make him kick you out, or let you stay and avoid you from then on. cause that is what will happen.